Faith After Loss: Wrestling with God in Grief

​(Spoiler: God can handle your questions)
 
Hey friend,
 Let’s have some real talk.
 
Somewhere along the way, a lot of us picked up this idea that “good Christians” are supposed to handle grief with quiet grace, unwavering faith, and maybe a perfectly highlighted Bible verse ready to go.
If you’ve ever gone through real, soul-crushing loss—whether it's pregnancy loss, the death of someone you love, or just the shattering of life as you knew it—you know that’s… well, laughable.
It’s messy.
It isn’t very clear.
Yes, sometimes it feels like you and God are in a full-on wrestling match where you’re unsure if you can scream, cry, or tap out.
Guess what?
You are allowed.
There’s biblical precedent for it. Let’s dive in.
 
You’re in Good Company, Meet the Wrestlers
Remember Jacob?
The guy wrestled with God all night long (Genesis 32). He walked away with a limp—and a blessing. How about Job? He lost everything and spent chapter after chapter questioning God, yelling into the void, and demanding answers. Then there’s Jesus, sweating blood in Gethsemane, praying, "If it’s possible, take this cup from me..." (Matthew 26:39) If they can wrestle, so can we.
 
Faith after loss isn’t about pretending everything’s fine. It’s about bringing your whole, broken, confused, angry, heart-sick self to God anyway.
 
 
 If You’re Mad… Be Mad. Own It.
Listen, if you’re mad at God right now….good.
It means your heart is still beating, your soul is still fighting, and you care enough to feel something.
So yeah—if you're mad…
BE MAD.
Throw the pillow—ugly cry. Yell in your car—Stomp around the house.
(Maybe warn your neighbors first if you're headed for a full-on psalm-worthy lament.)
 
Because here’s the thing...
God isn’t sitting in heaven clutching pearls because you raised your voice.
God isn’t offended by your anger.
God isn’t tallying up your emotional outbursts on some divine scoreboard.
 
God is the One who invites you to bring all of it—the rage, the confusion, the heartbreak. It says pour it out. All of it. The messy, raw, "I-don’t-even-know-if-we’re-on-speaking-terms-right-now-God" stuff.
 
So if you’re mad?
Own it.
God can handle it. God would rather have your honest fury than fake faith wrapped in a smile.
 
And here’s a secret no one tells you in Sunday School:
The path back to peace sometimes starts with a good, holy tantrum.
 
 
 
I won’t tie this up with a neat little bow because grief doesn’t work like that. Some days, faith feels like a whispered “help.” Other days, it feels like silence. The faith that survives grief isn’t weaker—it’s deeper.
It’s not shiny and perfect. It’s got scars, bruises, maybe even a limp. It knows what it is to hold on when everything else falls apart. That, my friend, is genuine faith.
 
Let’s Keep Wrestling Together
If you’re in that place of questioning, doubting, or just feeling spiritually exhausted, I see you. You’re not alone, and you’re not a “bad Christian.”
 
Come back next week when we’ll chat about:
Helpful and Hurtful Words 

​And if you need a little reminder in the meantime, here it is:
God isn’t afraid of your grief.
God steps into it with you.
So go ahead—wrestle. God’s not letting go.

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